I Hear His Whisper..."I am your great provider."
Proverbs 18:17-19:2
17 In a lawsuit the first to speak seems right,
until someone comes forward and cross-examines.
18 Casting the lot settles disputes
and keeps strong opponents apart.
19 A brother wronged is more unyielding than a fortified city;
disputes are like the barred gates of a citadel.
20 From the fruit of their mouth a person’s stomach is filled;
with the harvest of their lips they are satisfied.
21 The tongue has the power of life and death,
and those who love it will eat its fruit.
22 He who finds a wife finds what is good
and receives favor from the Lord.
23 The poor plead for mercy,
but the rich answer harshly.
24 One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin,
but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
19 Better the poor whose walk is blameless
than a fool whose lips are perverse.
2 Desire without knowledge is not good—
how much more will hasty feet miss the way!
Proverb Commentary
Avoid arguments
Proverbs is full of practical advice on how to avoid arguments.
1. Listen to both sides
There are usually two sides to an argument, and it is always worth hearing both parties. The right of cross-examination is an important one, with a vital place in any legal system. ‘The first speech in a court case is always convincing – until the cross-examination starts!’ (18:17, MSG).
2. Ask for the help of the Holy Spirit
We need God’s guidance especially when facing ‘tough decisions’ (v.18, MSG). In the Old Testament, ‘casting the lot’ was a way of settling disputes. However, with the outpouring of the Holy Spirit there are better ways of receiving God’s guidance over disputes (see 1 Corinthians 6:1–6).
3. Avoid unnecessary offence
Do everything you possibly can to avoid offending people: someone close to you who’s been offended can be ‘… more unyielding than a fortified city’ (Proverbs 18:19). Serious disputes create barriers among friends. These walls are easy to erect and extremely hard to pull down.
4. Choose your words carefully
Your words can be a life-giving force, bring great satisfaction and heal division: ‘Words satisfy the mind as much as fruit does the stomach; good talk is as gratifying as a good harvest’ (v.20, MSG).
Yet words can also be a destructive force: ‘Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit – you choose’ (v.21, MSG). You can do great good or great damage by what you say.
5. Choose your companions carefully
The writer says, ‘Find a good spouse, you find a good life – and even more: the favour of God!’ (v.22, MSG). It is certainly true in my experience that Pippa’s wisdom, advice and involvement have often helped me to avoid getting into trouble in this area. A good husband or wife will be a peacemaker.
Whether we are married or not, what we need are really close friends. The second part of this proverb reminds us that while friends come and go, ‘There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother or sister’ (v.24b). These are the sorts of friends we need in our lives. If you have friends like that, never stop thanking God for them.
Ultimately, of course, Jesus is the friend who sticks closer than a brother or sister.
Prayer
Lord, may the words I speak be a source of life to those around me.
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